Little White Butterflies

The sun is shining, the birds are singing,
And there you all are, just fluttering around.
Flying up, flying down, and going every which way,
It's like you're saying "Hello, it's good to see you."

Flitter flutter, flitter flutter,
I'm just standing here watching you fly.
I could go and come back,
And you would still be here.

Are you flying or are you dancing now,
Or are they both the same to you?
Doing the things you do, with nary a sigh.
It feels good to watch you, my little white butterflies.

Absent but not forgotten...

I've not forgotten about this blog.  I just haven't had much material or updates or anything to talk about.  Also went through bad storms and flooding in the Nashville area a couple of weeks ago.  My roommates and I got off light compared to a lot of other people.  There have been a lot of factors lately contributing to my lack of writing, trying to write, etc, but most are past now.  The only one I can think of right now that remains is proper sleep, which should not be a problem, but somehow blindsides me every now again.  Slips past, or something.

Anyway...

Yeah, I'm still here.  Had a lot of other things on my mind lately.  I'm prioritizing the various writing ideas/projects I got going on/floating around in my head.  Something productive will happen soon.  I promise.

Knight In Battered Armor

I am the one who will stand and fight for you.
I will put your well being before my own.
I will stand up for what's right, even if it means that I stand alone.
I will fight for what I believe in.
I will stand my ground, even though I may be outnumbered.
I will takes hits and fall, and still rise to fight.
I will protect you, even from myself, if necessary.
I will do anything and everything I can to keep you safe from harm.

I will do all I can to keep the promises I make.
I will defend your honor with every ounce of strength in me.
I will sacrifice my dreams before being the reason tears fall from your eyes.
I will respect your choices, even if it means being apart from you.
I will break my own heart before letting any harm come to yours.
I will love you until my last breath takes me away.

I am the one who fights for those I care about with no thought of reward.
I have my share of victories and defeats.
I am damaged, scarred, worn, and pierced from my battles.
There may be times when I fail in my duty, but I will accept the consequences of my failure.
And I will choose to stand tall, and continue to fight.
I am a knight in battered armor.

If You Don't Write It Down, It Never Happened

The title for this post was taken from a quote in the book "The Sum of All Fears" by Tom Clancy. It was said by Cathy Ryan during a scene at John Hopkins, and later said again by her husband Jack, when he was trying to help figure out how to fix the stock market mess.

That line isn't true in every case. I remember one night in Mesa, Arizona, when I took a walk down to a local supermarket and back. Just a quick, get-out-of-the-house walk. On the way to the supermarket, I came up with a poem. I just started talking to myself, one line at a time. However, on my way back, I realized that I had completely forgotten the entire poem. I couldn't remember a single line that I had come up with, and I was very disappointed, because it was one of my better poems. To this day, I still can't remember anything from that poem, but I know it happened.

Now I usually take some form of writing pad and pen with me everywhere I go. I don't always write anything, but if I suddenly think of a name for a character, a line for a poem, a phrase that stands out to me, etc, I immediately write it down. The downside to my doing this is that I've currently got three or four different notebooks and multiple sheets of paper with ideas, names, phrases, scene snippets, and there is no organization to them at all. I really should go through them and try to organize things. I don't know how that will work, but it's worth a shot. It would cut down on the clutter on the floor around my bed.

So give it a try. Take a small notepad and pen with you when you go out. If/when you have a small flash of inspiration, write it down. Expand on it later.

On a different note, it has occurred to me that using a Gaelic phrase for the title of this blog may not have been such a good idea, as I have no idea how to pronounce it. I just happen to really like the language (hope to learn to speak/read it someday), and it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Still writing...

You want to know something depressing? Or feel it? Keep telling a bunch of people you know that you're gonna write something and you'll post a bit for them to look at. An excerpt, a poem...something. Then the next thing to do is actually write something. Then you post it.

And then you watch while no one notices. Thanks a lot world. I finally produce something, and no one notices or acknowledges it. Really makes me feel bad.

Nano result

Well, I didn't complete NaNoWriMo. I didn't expect to. On the Monday before Thanksgiving, my glasses broke, and I had to go get an eye exam and get contacts. The following week, my sister had a baby and my car threatened to make me get it towed to a repair shop. So, my last couple weeks of November and the first week of December were a big roller-coaster of events both good and bad.

All in all, I got about 7k words written. I definitely need to redo much of it, because it's turning out more like the story to Final Fantasy 7 than anything else. I need to have some kind of outline, or else I won't have any clue as to where my story is going to go. Some people may do better without any kind of outline, but unfortunately, I am not one of them.

I accomplished my goal for signing up for NaNoWriMo, though. I started to write, and I've written more in the past month than I have in the past 2 years.

Quantity, Quality and the First Draft

I've fallen way behind in my daily goals for NaNoWriMo. Last Sunday was the 15th, marking the halfway point. On target Word Count was 25k. My actual count was about 6.2k. Yeah. WAY behind. But after having talks with both of my parents and some people I know locally, I keep being reminded that it isn't about hitting that 50k mark. At least, not ALL about it. Not for me. I sometimes feel like I've lost my focus. I started this thing, signing up for NaNoWriMo '09, to get into the habit of writing. There have been days when I stressed about how far behind I am and that's when I need to remember that, for me, this is more about writing this story, then writing a certain number of words in a 30-day period.

I know that the object of this month is to get it written, and save the editing for later. I think it was Ernest Hemingway who said "The first draft of anything is s***." I try hard not to go back over what I've already written and change things up. On the other side of things, I have no idea where my story is going or what it is going to be about. I've got some ideas for scenes and characters and sub-plot-thingies. Big picture...nothing. Zilch. Nada. (Noodle)

Quantity is the goal for NaNoWriMo. Quality comes after November. I'm probably not going to make the 50k mark, and I think I'm okay with that. As long as I keep plugging away at it, as long as I write something each day, my story will eventually get done. Or get to a point where I decide to end the current story and begin editing.